What to do if the husband on a dating site is yours

According to unemotional statistical data, singlehood is the scourge of Singapore population. The percentage of single men and women in 2000 was 51,7%, in 2015 it became almost 20% higher, that is 71,4%. This data concerns singles from 25 to 29 years old, the age seemed to be mature enough to start up families and get married. No wonder, that international and local dating sites are prospering and attract more and more users. With a rapid pace of life in Singapore, on-line dating is an effective tool to find a partner, a potential husband/wife, or just a friend to go to the bar. It saves time, energy and gives a chance to retreat in time without an annoying showdown.

Though, it would be not honest to say that in the virtual dating world only singles and loners inhabit. Indeed, many men and women in relationships, or in a marriage, visit dating sites from time to time, or on a regular basis, and often hide that from their partners. And nowadays the situation when a wife finds out that her husband has a profile on a dating site happens as often as the situation when she catches him in the unholy act. But how to react to such a situation is not always clear. So, what to do and what to think if the husband on a dating site is a not fictional one, but yours?

Before undertaking any measures dictated by emotions and the first instinctive reactions, take a deep breath, drink a glass of water, count from on 1 to 10 and whatever to calm down and stop yourself from imagining the worst. The fact that your husband uses dating sites may not be so disastrous, though he should not be there. The world as well as people is not black or totally white. There should be other colors and tints.

The first reason to consider is that dating sites like Cupid or Tinder focus now on helping users to find like-minded friends, and do not limit themselves to matchmaking. Their goals are to link people with the same interests, hobbies, activities, and even Facebook likes. The second reason to think over is the self-esteem of your husband. In case he is profoundly narcissistic, he might use dating sites to check his charms and assure himself that his magnetism has not disappeared over time. If those are your cases, then there is no sense to confront and undermine your relationships with your distrust and suspicions. And the last thing to meditate on is whether you want to keep marriage despite that fact that your husband did want to have an on-line affair without any obligations and did not want to make any friends. If your answer is ‘Yes’, then this situation happened to give you the pause for thought and try to save you family by re-evaluating and improving your relationships.

 

 

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12 Responses to “What to do if the husband on a dating site is yours”

  • Just Be A Good Sport..:

    ‘Play’ with him!

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  • Lee Kim Chew:

    Who cares?!

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  • Bapak:

    70% of the girls are asking for money, just like the stupid Sinkies.

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  • Donald J Trump:

    People that go Online Dating?
    1) they want to find an Ang Mo wife, Ang Mo hubby
    2) because they want to escape from their birth country that is economicallly stressful rat race
    3) they find a Ang Mo guy or Ang Mo gal more less rude, maybe better manners

    However, in Japan there are more Japanese as many choose not to get married
    http://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2015/06/22/national/social-issues/nearly-40-of-single-japanese-not-interested-in-romance-survey/#.WMBfbpHEmhA
    In Asia, married for love is a Western Hollywood Concept
    You married to a man that can provide you the basic comfort of life, not struggle to survive

    In Asia, in the world more Millen Men is not interested in sex
    Mullen Men is more interested in Virtual Sex, Sex Dolls where Dolls are always friendly & nice
    Today’s women are downright rude, aggressive, pushy, pressurize society
    In Japan virtual sex is a big hit
    https://youtu.be/wLSLcFfEgkw
    In USA vitrutal sex is a big hit
    https://youtu.be/O1XPkTn2xvI
    Even married men prefer virtual sex than their nagging wives
    https://youtu.be/h7Z4dzjGK0k
    Virtual sex is getting more sex
    https://youtu.be/kM6gCqhtxyQ
    Virtual sex will be more popula, more enjoyable compare to real human sex

    Some sexual fantasy or that surreal actress you dream about is more made possible with simulation touch gadgets, that a real women cannot perform.
    A recent survey that men watch online porn causes than to stay indoors rather than go out to find a girlfriend

    With all these Alternative Lifestyle & choices, why would you want to get married?

    Besides, the future survival for any countries is having a tiny population with deep skills
    Gone are the days when you need cheap labor as a added strength
    Big population is a headache when 50% of all human economical activity is replaced by robots
    1) robots
    2) technology
    3) automation
    4) drone
    5) driverless gadget
    Are capital investment that strengthen the country as a economic power
    Gone are the days of cheap labor intensive industries

    If you don’t get married, your Govt. is not worried
    In fact, having a one child policy or two child policy social engineering is ideal
    Big family with 5 to 7 children is a burden to the country competitiveness

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  • Donald J Trump:

    New Economically Reality contribute to the Changing Norms, Changing Attitude of our society

    In the past, you must get married
    Present day, you option out
    Your parents no longer push you to get married

    Question:” why they are not pushing for it?
    Answer:” Job Security is a thing of the past, they prefer you stay single. The chances of you coming to borrow money from them during their old age is very high, when the cost of living is very high.”

    Question:” why they are not pushing for grandchildren.”
    Answer:”of you cannot afford it, better don’t own it, don’t come begging in tears to borrow money from them.” Today’s old folks had to work

    In the past, old folks had Retirement
    Today this word is dinosaurs, every old folks is working, they would probably die in their working uniforms
    Those dinosaurs pictures where you seen old folks after they cook dinner, sit outside the stone chair chit chat is history textbooks

    Question:” how about emigrated to another country.”
    Answer:” not bothered, don’t care, not against it. ” Singapore is not like those days…..you know what I means. Life is getting tough, everything is so expensive, you plan for your future.

    Youth hanging outlook about the future
    Parents changing views about life
    Economical situation, Job insecurity, High cost of living is changing OUR VALUES

    Cannot be help, cannot be avoided
    What we are dead against in the past, today we find it acceptable
    Times had changed, our values had moved with the times to survive

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  • Donald J Trump:

    Your parents would probably said this

    Planned your own future, cannot be here forever
    Singapore, life is getting harder & harder
    If you don’t want to start a family is not bad things after all
    When don’t had money to lend you, old folks had to work too
    You can hardly save any money theses days, $50 cannot buy anything these days, everything is so expensive here in Singapore, it will get even more expensive, becoming like Hong Kong, Tokyo

    If you can emigrate to a better country
    Bring us along when you we don’t mind setttle down comfortably in another country

    Some young parents are open to the idea that sending their children overseas education
    Can open the door for emigration
    Following their daughter or son to relocated overseas, at least they could obtain a couple of years so called old age retirement

    All these are unheard of in the past
    Today it had become an open option, if life in Singapore become very tough
    WHY NOT, we follow you overseas where cost of living is low

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  • No surprises here:

    I hate to break it to you but some local women give their local husbands strong reasons to look elsewhere. If you treat your man right, he won’t look at another woman, not even a stewardess/model.

    The key to a man’s heart is through his……. and not his stomach (most men anyway).

    If you always behave like a starfish in the bedroom then how?

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  • LIONS:

    Online dating is as risky as online gambling.
    It will turn into addiction.

    Married people,men n women, shud refrain from playing eith “FIRE” as it can get “wild” n become destructive.

    If you are rich n have spare cash,go do some charity.
    It will take your mind off dubious indilgences?
    Well,easier said than done.

    Men are a form of animal,in some ways…

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  • N.Jungne:

    Date him lah, aiyoh

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  • Read & Hear The Right Things:

    Sillypore is great again. No more issues to report? Everything is well or untouchable? Stay focus on your cause and news. Don’t stray to frivolity. TRE cannot save the world’s problems. One evil theme is good enough.

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  • Dirty Old Man:

    Dating sites is a dangerous place. Most of the reponses you get are psuedo. I suspect african cons are operating in that mode. Avoid these sites and you will be happier for it.

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  • fvtgyhnuj:

    If he is not on sex social networking sites, then why not? Is no wrong to make friends with opposite gender as long you inform your partner about it, not going out 1 on 1 with them and setting up dos and don’ts.

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